The Zookeeper’s Wife



Where watched: My girlfriend’s parents house
Who with: My girlfriend and her parents

I never really enjoy movies at home as much as I do in the theater, so this movie never really had a chance.

While sitting on the couch with my girlfriend and her parents, we decided that we wanted to watch something “lighthearted”. So we landed on The Zookeepers Wife. This movie about nazis murdering a bunch of animals, and humans during the holocaust with just a little bit of rape mixed in.

So Jessica Chastain and her husband run this zoo. Then the nazis come and just kill all the fucking animals.Then the nazis decide they are gonna like just chill at the zoo all the time. At this point, the zookeeper decides they are gonna help some Jewish refugees hide there. More like the Jewkeepers Wife. Seems like a weird plan because the nazis are always at this zoo, so hiding them there doesn’t seem all that safe.

The main nazi, played by Daniel Bruhle (Rush is an awesome movie) really wants to bang Jessica Chastain. So I guess he is always around because he wants some cows to fuck or something? Then he tries to kikeold the zookeeper but Chastain is like, nah man.

I felt like we kinda got jewed out of a climax because when the head nazi finds out they housed Jews, he threatened to shoot the wife and her son, but then he just left. That was it. Movie over.

Favorite scene: there was a scene where they killed a bunch of animals that I thought was kinda funny just because it was so ridiculous.

Overall score: 52/100 This movie was a real snoozefest, or jewsfest if you will. Not for me.

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